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July 24, 2012
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This was going to be a rant...

Journal Entry: Tue Jul 24, 2012, 2:49 AM


Somehow, I ended up on a site called SoSuave.com. It's a dating website, with tips for men to pick up women. Sounds innocuous enough, right?
It is filled with such gems as~:

"How and Why Women Test You
Have you ever called a woman on the phone to set up a date and had her say: "Friday night? Sure. Call me on Friday and we can talk about it..."?
Or have you ever had a woman ask you if you're a player?
Or have you ever asked a woman for her number and had her say "Why don't you give me your number and I'll call YOU"?
Well guess what... you were being tested. At some level, the woman you were dealing with was testing to see how much control she had in the relationship.
The paradox of "testing" is that if you COMPLY with what a woman SEEMS to want, you will usually FAIL the test.
Hey, I never said that it made sense."

"You NEVER want to be in a position of waiting for a woman's call or leaving it up to her to call you. [...] If a woman is uncertain about when she is available, instead of saying, "Call me and let me know" tell her "OK, I will call you by the end of the week and see if you figured your schedule out a little better." Keep the power and control to yourself. You will be much better off and you will come across as a more attractive and confident guy."

On 'The SIlent Pause': "If she says no, for example, to you going out in the next two weeks because her dog died, say nothing but continue looking at her. By responding to her objection you confirm in her mind that you agree with it and take the pressure off her. By saying nothing you show her that you do not accept what she says and expect a different response. In most cases she will come up with a different response from her original one."
Psychological manipulation? SEXAH>

And this asshole www.sosuave.com/quick/tip208.h…
Hypnotising women into dating him? If I had a week I couldn't explain all the things wrong with that.
Also, get a look at the disclaimer at the bottom of the page. It is laughable.

I was about to go on a massive rant filled with capslock and rage at their pathetic understanding, not only of women, but of BASIC HUMAN NATURE (there's that capslock :|)
And then I realised.
It's a dating website, designed to teach men who act like this to be more of an arsehole.
With this sort of advice, it is effectively keeping men like this out of the dating game.
so
good going sosuave.com, and if I ever run into anyone using these techniques, I will know that they have to resort to shit advice on the internet to get a date.
And I will laugh.

Add a Comment:
 
:iconartiestroke:
ArtieStroke Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
It's times like these I wish I could come up with some sort of creative swear for this situation. You know, something Littlepip could be proud of. Because that's how messed up this is.
Reply
:iconwhysoseriouss:
whysoseriouss Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2012
I find that ShitFuckTittyBalls serves most situations, and rolls off the tongue quite nicely! :)
Reply
:iconartiestroke:
ArtieStroke Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Luna's tidal shifting orgasms, that's ingenious!
Reply
:iconevildoctermcbob:
EvilDocterMcBob Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2012
I'm fairly certain it's just a troll site made to piss off and amuse people. the disclaimer and part about a dog dying was quite a pair of tip offs.
Reply
:iconthepoeticpaladin:
ThePoeticPaladin Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Poe's Law, mate. If you disagree with someone strongly enough, it becomes impossible to recognize their views as having been arrived at logically. In sociology, it's referred to as "the illusion of asymmetric insight".
Reply
:iconevildoctermcbob:
EvilDocterMcBob Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2012
I don't really care too much about troll bait man. You seem to be more engrossed in the topic since you've taken the time to write large paragraphs proving why you must obviously be correct. <.<
Reply
:iconthepoeticpaladin:
ThePoeticPaladin Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Troll bait? What?

>why you must obviously be correct

That, or I'm defending my reasoning. God forbid I do that.
Reply
:iconevildoctermcbob:
EvilDocterMcBob Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2012
Troll bait would be trolls, those who enjoy annoying/enraging others, putting out bait, mainly opinions that are largely disagreed with by the general public, in order to illicit anger. Usually it's rather obvious, like when one may see a youtube comment saying "Justin bieber is the best singer ever, led zeppelin and the beatles are shit. Bieber fever 4evar" I suppose this could be regular behavior but I assume you get the point.

Anyways, this looks to be turning to an comment argument that I don't care to partake in. Sorry I became defensive because you called me out on not being objective about something trivial. Ta-ta
Reply
:iconthepoeticpaladin:
ThePoeticPaladin Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
So... I'm "troll bait" for disagreeing with someone?

Cool story, bro.
Reply
:iconevildoctermcbob:
EvilDocterMcBob Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2012
Not you, I was talking about the site.
Reply
:iconthepoeticpaladin:
ThePoeticPaladin Featured By Owner Jul 26, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
That makes slightly more sense, but I don't really see how.
Reply
:iconthepoeticpaladin:
ThePoeticPaladin Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Actually... The samples you cited aren't that bad of advice. The problem with objecting to using psychology to your advantage is that psychological phenomena exist regardless of whether they're taken advantage of. The author of this site appears to confuse gender and sex, but it is a feminine trait to expect someone who is masculine to exert control; that's a portion of what masculinity is. Whether you're male or female, if you are attempting to portray yourself as being masculine, then it makes sense to purposely rebuff token attempts at asserting control (note that I use the word "token"; I would not have used this man's example of "her dog died", but if someone tells me that s/he doesn't know when they'll be able to contact me, I'll tell them when I intend to contact them). If you're attempting to attract someone who seeks masculinity in a mate, it makes sense to act in a manner that is psychologically tied to masculinity. Changing the way you act to better yourself (even if it's only "better" in the sense of better representing yourself as the type of individual you would like to be, regardless of whether this is seen as better by others) is a perfectly acceptable task. Teaching yourself not to accept the word "no" as a response is just as valid of a change of character as teaching yourself not to chew your nails while waiting for something. Both change the way others view you, if the way they change you is one you desire, it's something that I would recommend engaging in.
Reply
:iconwhysoseriouss:
whysoseriouss Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2012
"it is a feminine trait to expect someone who is masculine to exert control"
Is it really though? Are you sure your perspective isn't skewed because you are a man? I'm not saying that it is, I'm saying that I am a girl, and I don't expect that.


"Teaching yourself not to accept the word "no" as a response is just as valid of a change of character as teaching yourself not to chew your nails."
Yes, that is a valid point and it would be nice if the world was assertive in dealing with its problems, but if a woman says that she doesn't want to give you her phone number, it is up to her to set those boundaries and not you. Refusing to accept a firm no is probably the most irritating trait I have ever encountered in my life.

I also object to this website's treatment of 'women' as a whole, 'women' as an entity with the same traits and habits and thoughts does not exist. There are some people who think like that, and others who don't.
Reply
:iconthepoeticpaladin:
ThePoeticPaladin Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Of course my perspective is skewed. I'm a man that aspires to be masculine. I would like to point out the difference, though: One can be "masculine" regardless of sex. My ex-boyfriend was extremely feminine, acting in a manner typically culturally associated with women; this is because masculinity and femininity are not necessarily tied to sex. There is a correlation, naturally, but the one does not necessitate the other. The trait is one associated with masculinity, at least through what I've seen. Cultural norms differ based on geographic location, perhaps what I see as "masculine" is only masculine within the US (or even the state of Michigan).

The sections of the site you linked to did not seem as though they were encouraging "refusing to accept a firm no". The first was telling you to refuse attempts to put the power of a call in the hands of the woman; at the point where a woman is offering you a phone call later, I would not quite call the situation as involving a "no". The second quote is even less tied to this; it's a way of making it clear that you disapprove without allowing for the potential of an argument. They are about removing or altering a less-than-firm answer, not about bullheadedly ignoring a woman's protests.

How would you have them rephrase it? Open the entire website up in MSWord, use the find and replace function to change "women" to "most women"? The fact is, the reason that things are culturally associated with sexes is because most people of each sex fit within a set of traits. Every group has exceptions. Generally speaking, most schizophrenics are smokers (it's true, look it up). Given that the (relatively vast) majority of schizophrenics are smokers, I do not feel it would be presumptuous, should I meet a schizophrenic, to assume he smokes. Yes, a fifth of schizophrenics do not. However, if you pick one at random, this trait associated with the group he belongs to will most likely belong to him. Similarly, there are mannerisms associated with men and women; not all men or women hold these traits, but enough do that it can be assumed they do. Very few people would claim that all men or all women like "x" or dislike "y". However, if I were to say that "men dislike clothes shopping", I would assume that you are intelligent enough to understand that I am referring to the majority of men. There are plenty of guys out there who take enjoyment in seeking out their new wardrobe. However, most men (at least, within the culture I have been raised in) are like me: They see a white or red shirt they like, it's cheap, they buy it. Clothes shopping done.

Refusing to accept that a purpose of a group's existence is for the allowance of generalizing that group when discussing members of it is about as pedantic as one can get. No one was under the illusion that every member of the group was identical, pointing out that they are not is redundant.
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:iconkasverah:
Kasverah Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
' P.S. By signing up you agree to not hold me personally responsible if women start chasing you, stalking you, harassing you, and pursuing you relentlessly.'
Bwahahaahaaaa

Also derp. I don't honestly think these things will actually work, I worry it might work on some people though...but seriously, how on earth did you get there?
Reply
:iconwhysoseriouss:
whysoseriouss Featured By Owner Jul 24, 2012
I was on tumblr, then I searched the word bitch to get a tag, and then I was on heartlessbitches.com and then I read all their rants (oops) and then this was in a comment. So I read it too. I do recommend heartless-bitches.com though.
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